Claudia v. Hamlet

Day 2 in Court

(Scene I)

Judge: Defense, you may call your first witness.

Defense: Your Honor, we call Ophelia to the stand.

Bailiff: (Witness Stands) Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth?

Ophelia: I do.

Defense: Ophelia, can you please describe to us Hamlet’s behavior before you obeyed your father’s orders and refused Hamlet’s affections.

Ophelia: Well… He was a very soulful, loving person but he was greatly distraught with the death of his father and his mother less than commendable marriage, but that didn’t change how passionate he was.

Defense: And when you say passionate you are referring to his affection for you, correct? Just so that we have that clear.

Ophelia: Of course. Hamlet and I have a very strong and pure connection and truly do love each other.

Defense: Now, can you please describe his behavior after you began rejecting him.

Ophelia: Well, he went crazy. After I followed my father’s order, the next time he saw me he grabbed my forearms and shook me because he was so mad. I am just so conflicted because I know I should listen to my father, but Hamlet needs me there for him, without me he falls apart and I love him too much to do that to him.

Defense: That’s understandable, so when you realized Hamlet had gone mad who did you first go to?

Ophelia: Well my father of course.

Defense: Why? After all he was the one who originally told you to reject Hamlet’s affections, so why not go to someone else?

Ophelia: Because he’s my father and I assumed that he would be able to guide me in the right direction as to what I should do. The last thing I would want is for me to do something without my father’s guidance and then have my actions shame me or my family.

Defense: So you go tell your father about Hamlet and ask for his advice. What is his response?

Ophelia: He told me to not give in and begin to reveal my feelings for Hamlet just yet. He wanted to tell Claudia first.

Defense: And why would he want to do that?

Ophelia: Because word of Hamlet’s insanity would eventually spread, God forbid that the press would hear of it. If Hamlet’s insanity were to become widely known then it would only reflect on the family and the rest of the hierarchy within the business which would cause dissension with stockholders. So it was pertinent that Claudia knew so that she could settle the matter before it got too out of hand.

Defense: Thank you, Ophelia. You may step down.

(Scene II)

Judge: Defense, please call your next witness.

Defense: Your Honor, we call Polonius to the stand.

Bailiff: (Witness stands) Do you swear to tell the truth, the whole truth and nothing but the truth?

Polonius: I do (Witness sits).

Defense: Polonius, can you please explain to us what you did after your daughter Ophelia came to you with the news of Hamlet’s madness.

Polonius: I told her that I would tell Claudia, his step-mother, and let her handle the situation.

Defense: Polonius, I would like to remind you that you are under oath so I shall rephrase the question. When your daughter came to you with the news that Hamlet went mad you thought you had the perfect opportunity to curry a little favor with the head of the company, didn’t you? You thought that this was your chance to finally move up in the company by performing such a heroic deed; you would be saving the entire family from a media circus, so why wouldn’t Claudia promote you?

Prosecution: Objection your honor, badgering the witness!

Judge: Sustained, defense please move on and don’t start taking liberties.

Defense: Yes your honor. (To Polonius) Please explain to us what happened in the conference room with Gerry and Claudia.

Polonius: I explained to them what my daughter had explained to me and provided them with a few emails he had sent my daughter that I found to be quite inappropriate. After hearing all they needed to hear, they sent Rosencrantz and Guildenstern to find Hamlet and observe his behavior themselves.

Defense: And what was contained in these emails?

Polonius: Hamlet’s continuous proclamations of love.

Defense: Well if you were privy to these onslaughts prior to Hamlet’s insanity why not immediately take the matter to Claudia and Gerry?

Polonius: Because I believed it to be an idle passion that would easily be squelched by Ophelia’s rejection.

Defense: Yet if it truly was a passion he had for Ophelia, wouldn’t you, a man who has already created two children, know better than the latter that passion is not something that can simply be squelched. In fact, if we were to speak candidly, would it not be reasonable to say that passion can drive a man mad?

Polonius: I suppose so.

Defense: Then with that knowledge, why not allow your daughter be with the man she loves? Unless of course, you want him to remain insane, which would explain why instead of allowing Ophelia to follow her heart’s desire, you told Claudia and Gerry their son was insane.

Polonius: (Remains Silent)

Prosecution: Objection your Honor, relevance!

Defense: Your Honor I am merely supporting the platform of our case which is that Hamlet was driven insane by not only the scandal between Gerry and Claudia, but also with the rejection of Ophelia’s love.

Judge: Overruled, defense you may continue.

Defense: Thank you, your Honor. (To Polonius) Now, after Gerry and Claudia left the room, you finally had the chance to speak to Hamlet. Face to face. Am I correct?

Polonius: That is correct.

Defense: And how would you describe his mental state?

Polonius: He was extremely unstable, to say the least. He had completely forgotten who I was, but, of course, he knew quite well that I had a daughter that he was very interested in.

Defense: Thank you, Polonius. No further questions, your Honor.

Judge: Defense, you may call your next witness.

Defense: We call Hamlet to the stand, your Honor.

-Defense Direct Examination-

Judge: Does the prosecution have any questions?

Prosecution: We do, your Honor.

Judge: You may proceed then.

Prosecution: Thank you, your Honor. (To Hamlet) Can you please explain to us what happened in the conference room after you spoke with Guildenstern and Rosencrantz and found out they were sent to observe you.

Hamlet: Polonius entered the room with actors I had met a few years back and would be performing for the company and the annual company banquet.

Prosecution: And can you please describe the discussion you had with these actors.

Hamlet: I merely asked them to perform a play in which a Priam kills Pyrrhus by pouring poison in his ear.

Prosecution: Well isn’t it shocking that this play seems to mirror the death of your beloved mother, since the autopsy had stated that she had passed due to a poison that was poured into her ear.

Hamlet: I suppose it is.

Prosecution: In fact, if I didn’t know better I would propose that you chose this certain performance to serve as a test.

Hamlet: What do you mean?

Prosecution: Well look at the facts, your mother is dead due to poisoning and not even a month later your aunt marries your father. Then after that you receive a letter from who else but Hannah, your mother, saying she was murdered. How much more convenient could it get? But there’s one more piece to this puzzle. We can’t forget that you were also insane, but hold on just a second. If you were really insane, why would you opt for that play in particular, unless of course you were pretending you were insane and knew that this play would serve as a lie detector?

Hamlet: I find what you have said to be very callous and uncalled for. I have been subjected to the heaviest of burdens with the death of my mother and have only been further shamed by my father’s remarriage. So instead of asking me why I am insane, wouldn’t the proper question be, why not?

Judge: I’ve had enough. The prosecution may rest and we shall continue this tomorrow morning.